Moving On...

Most of us don't like change. The familiar is comfortable, even though sometimes having the all too familiar all the time might not be the best thing for us....

My little corner for the last nine of my ten years at work. And I thought I was going to retire here. Making a decision like this is never easy... yet it's been a lesson(s) of sorts. I think I am heeding the still small voice, but I don't know where it'll lead. My own voice drowns out a lot of other voices very often and gotten me more than my share of trouble.

I've always wondered why abused wives stay on with their abusive husbands. I think I understand better now. We feel that it's the only thing we know.... because we prefer the known to the unknown. Change is difficult to come by because we are uncomfortable with it, especially when it involves something that is routine.

The process of leaving behind the familiarity of the last decade has been hard. I don't think that I'll miss the work place much. It's the friendship which I'll miss... lots I think. Ever since I got news that I was going to move, this has been a day I sort of dread... I mean, I am really looking forward to the hols but some things change somewhat from this point. I'll miss some of my favourite food at school. We have a few food arrangements of our own ever since we decided to stop eating at the canteen a few years ago. I think I'll miss that too. I doubt I'll ever have another friend strong headed enough to forgo a convenience like that. And I'll miss having a friend who stands for what (and who) she believes in.... even when it cost.

I remember a series of talks on relationships during my MYF days; the different types of relationships that we have in our life - colleagues, acquaintances and friends. The first group is made up of people with whom we are thrown together. We have no choice but meet them daily because we work together. Acquaintances are people we meet at functions, through other friends... basically people we bump into, off and on but have no real ties. The last category - friends. They are the ones who mean something to us... but this group is perhaps hardest to really have..... and easiest to miss.

Good friends are hard to come by. A good friend who stays true to us is even harder to come by. I'm blessed to have a friend like that at work, loyal and steadfast. Though our friendship extends to beyond our work place now, it's still something that brings an ache in my heart when I think about it. I'm a sentimental fool when it comes to relationships. But if I were to sum out the support I've had from this friend in one word, it's 'unwavering'. That is the greatest blessing in my years there. And the hardest to leave behind.

There can be a few reasons why going to work can be an everyday event one looks forward to. I'll leave the 'earn money' part out cos we work for a living. Modernisation and specialisation have virtually ensured that all of us need to work because we are no longer self sufficient. Anyway, why work can be 'fun'. One, because we enjoy it. Two, because of friends. For the latter, I've learned that even the worst of days become very bearable and turn into lessons of sorts because there's someone to soften the blows, reason stuff together, watch out for each other....

Good friends represents a world not born because they help us see different perspectives positively. And also because they interpret our world in light and not shades. And the result is often the birth of a world of possibilities and discovery. That I'll miss loads. Most of the time, we tend to add fuel to the fire.... that's why we love gossips.... they come naturally. But truly good friends do better than gossip. They make us into better people and make this journey of ours very bearable.... even enjoyable.

I realise too that change is something that I don't embrace readily this time around. If I can turn the clock back to that particular point when I started this wheel turning, I think I might just have let that moment passed.... But change is necessary in life too, I think. If we sit too long in one spot, we become complacent. We tend to become set in our ways... (I don't think being set is good...). But, today, I hovered longer than usual, staying on a little while extra, doing what we usually do, talk... and that is a routine I'll miss.

This is another journey into another semi unknown, with probably lots of adjustments to be made. I'd probably miss my little corner with the comforts that we've added along the years and the plants I've tended to. And oh.... the space. But what I'll miss most will be the company of a truly good friend. When next year begins in a month or so, I think I'll be missing quite a bit of everything that has summed up our last few years.... 8(