Wednesday, December 15, 2010

When a teacher marries his student...

Now what do you say when a 23-year-old teacher marries a 14 year old student? How many of us feel that 14 is a good age to be married today? The husband is 23 years old, supposedly the 'abang angkat' to the bride and also her younger siblings' religious tuition teacher. Wah! Better be careful who we allow into our homes... silap-silap our daughters and sons kena the marriage trap also. LOL!

I thought when we send our children to teachers, they are in safe hands to be nurtured and educated. Can this be considered an act of betrayal of trust then? Throw in religion as a point for argument, and this results in everyone being forced to shut up. God becomes the de facto one sided arbitrator, not of His willing choice, I'm sure. So if a girl starts menstruating at the age of 10, does that mean that she can also be married off?

The Law Minister says underaged marriage is okay while the Women's Minister says underaged marriage is morally and socially unacceptable, careful to leave out religion in her statement. I thought moral values are the fruits of religious beliefs. What is right then? The ambiguity. She also said that what is right may not be good. Right is supposed to be good in the bigger picture, I thought. So now right is not good... then is it okay to be not good if the action is right? I get confused!

At 14, how mature can a kid be today??? He (she) is more likely to still be rebellious, still trying to understand self, making sense of his world, etc, etc. And at that age too, if an older person showers them with attention, the likelihood of them drinking it all in is almost a sure thing. Nothing beats being showered with lots of attention at that stage.

But as a parent, I'd shudder to think of my 14 year old coming to me and saying he(she) wants to get married and that it's his (her) right. On one hand, we have the Child Act which is supposed to protect the children. On the other hand, we have the Syariah Court which can rule otherwise. Whose interests are being served and protected, I wonder sometimes.

Statistics show also that many child marriages don't last. So are they saying that statistics are right but may not be true. Maybe we are practising the exception to the rule... something which we seem to be doing a lot now. For example... all men are created equal except the Bumiputeras. All Bumiputeras are the same except the Malays... that's why only Ketuanan Melayu and not Ketuanan Bumiputeras. .. are the Orang Asli (Sengoi, Negrito, Jakun, Temiang, Kelabit, Dusun, etc, etc) considered Malays??? See why it can go so wrong??? ... this rule of exception.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Wow, that's crazy man. They should really try to do something to fix that.

Keats The Sunshine Girl said...

Poor child! even her parents say it's perfectly alright. Just take a honest poll: would you want it for your 14 year old child??

Thomas C B Chua said...

The poor 14 year-old must have been mesmerized by her "teacher" and as for her parents, it is good ridden of a heavy responsibility and by their shallow thinking a "religious tuition teacher" would make a good wife out of her. Look like some society is going backwards to medieval times !

PreciousPearl said...

teachers that have sex with underaged/ teenaged students in the UK get the sack, get prosecuted and get to go to jail.

But I guess there are different rules for different people in Bolehland.