Living With A Teenager...

I've a teenager.... and I think raising a teenager is not easy. At that age, they're not happy about many things. And parents also find it difficult to adjust to this wanting to break away thing. But I guess this is nothing new. Every generation before this say the same, and this goes back to even Plato and Hesiod's eras.

Generation gap... today's gap is made more difficult by the digital divide. Every generation has its own divide... our parents and their parents... the hippie days, flower-power, rock and roll. Mine and my parents?? ... dunno, coming out of Cold War fears, breaking down of the Berlin Wall, break up of Communist Russia, jeans and zippers, Michael Jackson, TV becoming a biggie influence in our lives... but all quite mild after the craziness of the previous gen.... 'make love not war gen'. LOL! But for what it is worth, I'm sure any parents regardless of whatever era found it difficult to understand what their kids were/are going through. 8)

My teenage years... yup! I was rebellious. But I think nothing in my muted rebelliousness prepared me for the response of this generation....I'm sure my parents would have said the same thing.

My parents were relatively strict and there were some rules which I felt didn't make sense. Well, I guess it had to do with I thought I knew better and also that I thought I had it under control. I was wrong on many counts. But whatever they did, I now know it was with my best interests at heart. I appreciate that.

Why the rebelliousness?? They are growing up and becoming individuals in their own rights. So there is this natural process of severing the 'second umbilical cord' from the parents. There would be conflicts, different ways of seeing and doing things. Also, there are wants and desires, which very often they can't have. And at that age, I'd say there are plenty. So, when parents say no, anger and resentment build up.

So what are these desires these days??

Gadgets... mainly the mobile, MP3, Wii, PSPs.... The mobile stands out from this list. I consider it a boon and bane thingy but most of the time it's the latter, until they learn to control themselves. And that's hard cos being young means you want to network. So, time and money become reasons for discords at home.

Relationships... somehow teenagers today can't wait to get involved.... more are getting involved in a relationship at a younger age. Is that good? I mean, if you were to look at this issue from a historical perspective, in ancient days, fatherhood (motherhood) started in the teens. But then again, life span was shorter then.... and they didn't have to be 'institutionalized'. LOL! And a couple of days ago, I read an article about girls and multi-dating... *shaking head*. I thought multi-tasking was complicated enough. This is a world of 'multi(s)' our teenagers are in now!!

Fast forward to this gen of kids who grow up mollycoddled by the comforts of life. What have you? You get hyper strung teenagers who cannot wait to have gf (or bf) cos everyone they know is having one. If you don't have one, then life feels kinda incomplete, that's what they say. And add that to the fact that these kids live in cocoons also meant they mature even later than naturally... you have these marginal man who seem to exercise very little restraint and behave foolishly. And for some reason, it seems more difficult for the boys.

We, parents are at fault here.... at fault for casting their safety net too far and wide! To the point that these kids fail to realize that they need to be responsible for themselves and their actions. And in their fits of emotional outbursts or lack of control, they unwittingly turn their back on family honour and name... So, you hear of seemingly good kids, getting themselves into trouble in the process causing anguish to their family and also sometimes putting a spanner into their own future.

So, while kids are having it better in terms of better education, health and possessions, they are finding it more difficult too... emotionally. More single parents, more working mothers.... and an excessively individualistic ethos plus an education system bent on producing A(s) rather than mould characters... they've contributed to more maladjusted young people.