Education vs 'modern day slavery'

Asian men are finding it more difficult to find wives... times are really changing, huh? And we've education to blame (thank??) for their predicament. Women were a downtrodden lot in olden days. 'Given away' into the husband's family, she doesn't have much say until she herself becomes a matriarch of her family. And the vicious cycle is repeated..... that's fodder for another day.

Reason? Education liberates! Yeah! Why slog as a live-in maid? Why confine yourself to the kitchen when the world awaits you? Marriage used to be a one-side heavy thingy - on both sides. Man bring in the dough. Woman take care of the kids and deal with all the home affair stuff. This arrangement would be fine except that it meant women were not financially independent. The man would hold the purse-strings and this would often mean that the women are 'held ransomed' in a way. You hear less of women walking out of a marriage because of this lack of independence.

So to be married in those days meant 'chasing' after the husband for the dough and the kids for the usual parent-kid things; to pick up the mess after them, face the endless piles of laundry, blah, blah, blah... Meanwhile, the men carry on with their jobs with minimal interruption. I've come to the conclusion that it's easier to be a man...

...else why widowers are more likely to remarry than widows? What you always hear is they need someone to take care of the kids; someone to take care of the house, them. A widow on the other hand would say that she's done enough of taking care of others... something along that line-lah. You know, I think women today have become master multi-taskers; juggling between home and work. But I guess it probably has also increased their level of stress.

Sometimes, I think marriage actually bogs a woman down cos they have to to mind 2 worlds, equally some more - their working world and their homes. Men? I don't think so their minds are equally divided into these 2 worlds. They're usually parked in their working world. So, gals... if a guy is madly and deeply in love with you, take it with a pinch of salt.. that 'madly' and 'deeply' thingy only last as long that long before something else 'takes over'... After the bliss has worn off and the mundaneness of life creeps in... they'll be madly into their jobs, money, position and sometimes other women... So working out something like a 'prenuptial' may be a good idea.

And like it or not... dads are usually too busy working to take note of what goes on the house. Kid goes to ask Dad something... he'll say go ask Ma. Then if you go ask Dad to do something about a mundane problem (like clearing up the bed)... they'll say why the Ma(s) are so fussy about this or that...

But the women's world and the men's world... sometimes they're more similar than you imagine. Many men think the women enjoy or 'pang-beh-lok' (cannot let go) the housework, chasing after the kids thingy. What they don't realize is how fast the women are adapting to the 'men's world' and getting used to the 'hassle-free' life. Bringing in the dough??? Anyone can do that these days... education provides that level playing ground. And it's kinda fun to be out working; financial independence, meeting people, a sense of accomplishment, etc, etc. At home...it's financial dependence, meeting kids and husbands, etc, etc...

But as a result of being highly educated, many women are finding it difficult to find a life partner... plus there is an increasing number who chooses not to tie the knot.... the rise of the Bridget Jones generation. That means less educated men are finding it more difficult too. The institution of marriage has come under siege.

The solution. In comes brides off the shelf thingy. For a price you can buy yourself a bride from countries like China, Vietnam, Cambodia - all those poorer nations. Women from these countries are literally sold by their families because of poverty. A friend related to me this story... a family bought a young lady into his family. This young woman not only had to take care of an old lady who was paralyzed but also served her husband. A one-in-all woman caught in the web of modern slavery. Used to read all these tales in the pre American Civil War days - of how the masters of the black women slaves considered it their rights to sleep with their slaves. Hence, the half black, half white children...

The shelf bride arrangements is gaining popularity for men in Singapore and to a certain extent Malaysia too. That is until some day,these women find their liberation. Until that day comes... pity them. I'm glad I'm not in their shoes. So, gals... go study hard. Education liberates!