The Marginal Man

Eons ago, when I was in uni, I took Anthropology and Sociology. One of the things I remembered learning was the 'marginal man'. The marginal man usually exists where there is a mix of culture and people. Basically that means he is fated to live in two worlds at the same time, which also compels him to assume, in relation to those worlds the different roles.... (Ha! Ha! The education was not wasted on me...)

And that is how I would describe the teenagers....they are marginal people. People stuck in two worlds; the kiddy world which they are about to leave behind forever and the adult world which they are about to enter for good.

So what do you call this land they are stuck in??? Yup! You are right! No man's land! LOL! They are there cos they're not quite ready to leave the safety and comforts of their previous world; neither are they ready to assume the responsibilities of the world they are about to enter.

The comforts of their previous world would include not having a mind of their own (read that as not having to make any decision). It's a relatively happy world. You go to sleep happy and wake up happy the next morning, free of cares and worries. Your parents do the worrying! You??? I dunno. I can't remember what I was thinking then!

The world to come is full of responsibilities. The safety net will eventually disappear. You have to make decisions and bear the consequences of your own actions.

There in lies the problem of these marginal people...principles and stands just about to take shape; neither having the abilities to support themselves, they appear rather whimsical. Emotions rule. Desires dictate.....and peers pressure. Each one comes with it its own sets of problems and consequences. It's a time which is also hard on the parents... especially this present generation. Protective parents try to shield their marginal children from the problems and pains, and a battle of wills take place, often times placing great strain to the family relationships.

The result?? Conflicts abound...with parents and even friends. Being in no man's land, it's hard to see beyond their own desires. I don't think the 'terrible twos' can beat the teenage years. Hence like the myopic who cannot see the path ahead clearly and later stumble, these teenagers will fall many times. And like those with tunnel vision who do not see the complete picture, they often feel persecuted by their parents. Cannot see the good the parents want for them completely! Only see one small part of the picture...add that to the emotions, desires and peer factors ...... you get a boiling cauldron. Everyone gets burned when they spillover!

So, there you have it...the world of the marginal man. I am rambling about it cos I am living with one. And like every parent I hope he will not get lost in this no man's land he is on now cos if he does....then he'll be stuck in limbo! But most do get out of it and turn out well. So there still is hope!